After 30 years as a counsellor, I sometimes feel like I've heard it all. This is, of course, until a new person walks through my door with the stories that make them unique, and almost immediately I am hooked. As I listen to those stories, and while I take notice of what it is that they want to work on, I usually find myself feeling incredibly privileged that they have chosen to share their vulnerability with me. One such person is a middle-aged man, who has three young children. In his early forties, he works as a health professional assisting young people during the day, and in his free time follows hobbies which many of us enjoy.
Read moreWhat Not To say
So, picture this! It was Thursday night, and I had a phone appointment in 29 minutes! The bus was due in three. As it takes approximately 22 minutes to get home at this time of night? Look, to say that I was cutting it fine, is a slight understatement
Read moreAsking Questions: A Key to Connection
A couple of weeks ago, I was reflecting on what I think are the key ingredients of connection. Well with all of the events going on around us in the world at the moment, I have been reflecting on what I think is another key ingreedient of connection, and that is our ability to ask questions.
Read moreSome Points about Anxiety
One of the things that I often explore with people in my private practice, is the whole topic of anxiety; the different ways in which it shows up for people, and also, how it might be managed more effectively. Of course it's not surprising that it appears regularly in my counselling room, when just a quick glance at Beyond Blue tells us that every year two million Australians suffer from anxiety.
Read more6 Things to Do When a Friend Is Diagnosed
When we hear the words breast cancer or MS, brain tumour or melanoma, I think it's true they can strike fear into our hearts. When it's one of our nearest and dearest, the news can be crippling.
We are suddenly searching for the right words to say, wondering what it is going to mean for them and their once so easily imagined future, but also wondering what it's going to mean for us.
So, I wanted to share with you some tips for how to deal with a friend being diagnosed, that I have gleaned over my years of working in the chronic illness and disability arena.
Read more6 Tips for Getting Your Feelings Out On Paper
If you've read my blog on sleep issues, you might have already guessed something about me, and that is — paper has been a great and trusted friend of mine for many years.
In fact, I often refer to it as "Paper the Ever-patient" because whether I am using the real McCoy in the shape of a notepad, or whether it's on a tablet or phone, it's usually something I can access easily. This friendship has been around since I was a teenager, and I have found that even in the most difficult times, if I can write, I can often get some clarity and restore some inner peace.
So, I thought I'd share with you a few of the ways in which I use paper, on the off chance that they could be worth investigating for yourself.
Read moreDealing with Flash Forwards
When you have been diagnosed with a chronic illness like MS, or a disability where your physical or cognitive abilities are challenged, I find that one of the things appearing in my counselling room, is the fear of how life as you know it now, is going to change in the future.
Read moreSleep Issues
When people come to see me as a counsellor, they often talk about how they are having sleeping problems!
They are either like me, and can't get off to sleep at night, or they wake in the middle of the night, and can't go back to sleep. And of course, if it's no news to me in the counselling room, well also it's one of the most commonly talked about things on the major health websites. It's in bookshops, on YouTube, on the radio ... there's so much information out there about how to get good sleep, that you might be forgiven for wondering, what could I possibly have to add to the equation?
Read moreFind Yourself In Music
Do you ever get that feeling that … no one, but no one, gets you? Not your partner, not your best friend … maybe not even your Mum?
Well I’m here to tell you that this is not a rare phenomenon. Even though sometimes you have the feeling that everyone else belongs … that everyone else fits in and that the only things you say are wrong, most of us feel like that, from time to time.
And how do I know this?
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